TAYLOR SWIFT!

TAYLOR SWIFT!!!!

yes

YES

YESSSS!

you are da best

JETT

my roomie and I get Esquire magazine bc the guy who used to live in our apt forgot to change his address. A half nakie kate beckinsale is on the cover (zzzz) but the mag's contents are kind of cool. Here are some lines from the What I've Learned section. feat. Joan Jett.

I remember times when I was at shows and the person onstage locked eyes with me. And in that moment, everything was right with the world. I think that's part of my job, to create these thousands of moments every night. and for the rest of their life, they can say "You guys looked at me," or "you sweated on me," or "I got your gum."

totes true!!!! One time i locked eyes with Kim deal and consider it a real lesbian experience in college. JK that actually never happend but I wish! And then another time I think i hit a crazy O during a beirut show. NEVER mind I'm just lying about that too!! This other time, I really thought I gave birth to something while seeing built to spill. it could have been a poop smear but it wasn't cus I'm totes just kidding all over you right now. But i really get what joan jett is saying....i need to be on the receiving end of that.

the sun, the smoking and drinking--I avoid them. I have friends the same age as me who do those things, and it's a whole different deal.

So yeah 30 years from now! I'll be sayin da same thing

The national anthem is a very hard song to sing. you gotta start in the right spot or you're screwed.

same thing with the birthday song

When the Runaways broke up, I didn't know what I wanted to do. A breakup is like losing a very good friend. It's like a death.

yes, it is. Not only am I losing Mika Miko this holiday season, but EVERYONE is. and it is a travesty!!! MIka miko, thank you for making music that I could dance to and feel good about and go crazy. can't even put to words how much love and admiration I have for MM. whatev I don't have to say anything, it's just a feeling!!!! and it overwhelms me

Read the entire thing here

wonny bunny

My brother is moving to Manhattan to be closer to me!!!!! JK he is definitely NOT doing this for me but I hope I get to see him more often anyway! even though he will be living in a ghetto ass faraway place off a subway line I didn't even know existed. JK it's the blue line, and I've def heard of it. Sometimes I take it if I want to make sure I want to NOT BE on time for important things.

I asked my mom how i should maintain my relationship with him now that we're in the same city and she said I should just call him and say, "OH wonny, my brother, how are you?" and then offer to buy dinner. I don't know if i want to do that just yet, just cus i have more frivilous online shopping I'd like to do before spending some coins on food commitments (I'm fine with eating peanut butter for dinner this week). But here's to my brother finally moving out of the houzz!!!! I'm so excited!!!!

ONE WEEK.

The week of Balloon Boy

I cannot stop thinking about the Balloon Boy hoax. It's such an amazing story. I love it so much because there is a perfectly crafted comedy within an unsuspecting tragedy. It's really incredible. There's also a fantastic modern-day twist, fully involving an alien hovercraft-y balloon and a reality television-hungry hero/villain. And the more things are revealed about this situation, the better the overarching story becomes. There is something Kafkaesque illuminating from the Balloon Boy tale.

I really believe the father could have been a successful author or screenwriter. It's clear he's very talented to think up so elaborately this entire adventure. The crises and tension that he crafted was impeccable: a child of six, the sibling who claimed to have witnessed his brother in the balloon, the missing basket, a history on Wife Swap (peculiar!), the unveiling of the balloon, the missing body, the impending search, the rejoicing reunion.

SO good. But too bad the father's fast and furious downfall resulted from the innocence and honest confusion of his six year old kid on national television. Note to parents: little kids are dumb. And then remember when on another interview, the little boy barfed on a morning show while his father was vehemently denying the publicity stunt accusations? Holy shit. This is out of control. I'm dying. This is the kind of story I'll keep in my back pocket.

Three other miscellaneous but crucial items: 1.) a scientist nerd alert, 2.) an Asian wife and bi-racial children, and 3.) names like Falcon and Ryo.

Geography Lesson

oldie but a shitty. was I the only perv in geography class or did everyone else see what I saw?

(PSSSST I'm talking about dicks)

Not normal

There's so much hoopla about this movie called Paranormal Activity -- it's hailed as one of the scariest movies EVER made. It's about a couple who think there are demons in their new house that come out at night. They begin rolling videotapes at night to document the entire thing and then......spooky things start to happen. I'm not gonna say any more because I don't know anything else about it!

Currently there are only midnight showings at select theaters but I have no doubts the movie is going to be released nationwide. But I hear from people who have seen it that audience members were crying, screaming, and walking out because they were so scared shitless. Others say they are afraid to go to bed now, that they've been psychologically damaged. 

See, I don't understand this world. A world that people actually want to be frightened. What is it about this notion of "controlled fear" that viewers put themselves in situations like this? But can fear even be "controlled"? I personally don't think so. I HATE horror movies and I can't understand people who are fans of them. Horror stories are sick, twisted, and inhuman. I see a trailer for a scary flick and think, "what could make someone think of such awful thoughts and put it down on paper?" It's kind of incredible that sick ideas could be shared with a wider audience with receptive responses.

Anyway, I'm a big scaredy-cat so I'm never ever going to watch Paranormal Activity anyway. Everything scares me. Like literally everything. I can't even hear The Beatles's "Strawberry Fields Forever" because the instrumental bridge reeeeally freaks me out, it just does. Right now I hear low growling but it's cool, it's just my tummy. I'm gonna go put a cookie in it.

That's the one

It's almost Halloween (yay!!) and my roommate bought a short black wig. She has tentative plans for the hairpiece but in the event she doesn't follow through with her initial idea, she luckily has a plethora of other ill options.

The short black bob is a statement, an attitude that will live on for ladydom generations. You can infer much from a girl who is bold enough to pull off the chopped, overdyed coif. She is shameless, outspoken, charismatic, and energetic. It's likely she's also a righteous bitch, or probably too intelligent for her own good.

She's sassy, a rather polite adjective for a girl-with-a-short-black-bob's rude or unladylike behavior. She can be hyper-sexualized but will give off the impression she's more modest than you think.

But anyway, you don't mess with her. She could F U up.

don't shit yrself!

I was just kidding (I'm not kidding)

My brother and father share the same birthday, and that was on Friday. I think it's so cool to be gifted your child on your birthday!! My father goes by the Chinese Lunar Calendar so his birthday dates vary slightly every year but in real life, he and my brother are bday twins.

So I went to get a blood test done and the nurse performed her worst yet. Medical people generally have a hard time locating my vein (buried in all that fat) so could be that this procedure was done incorrectly. A stranger at a party asked if I know someone who sells heroin.

ew

Heroin is disgusting. but Christmas Teddy is cute.

For general improvement of life and digestion, I've started taking psyllium husk. You can buy a container at Trader Joe's called The Secret of the Psyllium and it's packaged with this Egyptian hieroglyphic design over it to make it look all cool and ancient-remedy-like. I don't know how long you're supposed to wait until you experience the effects of so said miracle herb but so far it's only contributing to my constipation/bloating. So basically, doing exactly opposite of what it promises. Fuct^!!

Here are some images from the Griffiths Observatory in LA. There is never enough to discover about the infinite space.

LA Day 2

welcome to the rest of your life

this is real life aka NOT A DREAM

junk yard sale thing

hammer museum! this is the lobby. check out the ape in the corner!!

the artist only used tapes and adhesives to create all of this

ALL OF THIS. aww pig!

:)

real cool shit

it's like a dollhouse but it was a ballroom. detailssss were retardedly sickkk.

i loved this light installation! It's a tree that danced around through the different seasons. then the DJ started playing discovery "osaka loop line". great mood music!!!! check out this sweet vid I directed. (buwwwahah i'm just being dumb)

soooo.....what do you think abt life????

then we went into the museum's theater for the FLUX presentation. see previous post about that night's music vids and short films. totally rad!!!!

we ended the night with dessert, duhhh. I forget the name of the place we went to but listen, you get two soft cookies of your choice and a scoop of ice cream of your choice for only $1.25!!!! wuttt the hay

LA Day 1

o this guy

cool building

james took us to an ethiopian place!

omg my boobie

new mini coop!! pepper white!!

en route to Cali....

Backtracking. I just put some phunky photos on my computer. Let's gooooooo!

follow da graffiti road

nowhere/everywhere

transformers

weird cross & star thing built atop a mtn

i farted don't tell anyone

"lord of the onion rings"

al-bur-a-Q-r-Q (albuquerque)

red canyons for miles

ass

i was constipated and staring at this

indians!!!!

hudson at sunset

LA: FLUX, Tuesday night

disclaimer: these entries are out of order cus my brain's just catching up now

The Hammer Museum hosts a Flux ("a global creative community") screening series of music videos and short films periodically throughout the year. And it happened during the same week I was there!!!! Wow, such luck. I don't even know what luck is!!!! Anyway, since fate was farting it all over my face, we went!!!!

Tuesday's program so rad. Like real tight. Like off da hook. Illin' and sickin'. Real cool shit. Here they are below, in order.

A highlight was the Spike Jonze short "We Were Once A Fairytale," which couldn't have been more timely because of that Wild Things movie coming out and the short film's star Kanye West. And French director BIF's short "Dix (Ten)" was also an intense look at the psyche of an OCD patient. It was incredible.

The Dead Weather - Treat Me Like Your Mother

Dir. Jonathan Glazer

USA | 2009

Treat Me Like Your Mother-The Dead Weather from godbo6 on Vimeo.

Neurosonics Audiomedical Labs Inc.

Dir. Chris Cairns

UK | 2009

Neurosonics Audiomedical Labs Inc. from Chris Cairns on Vimeo.

Dix (Ten)

Dir. BIF

UK | 2009

Department of Eagles - No One Does It Like You

Dir. Patrick Daughters & Marcel Dzama

USA | 2009

Coldplay - Strawberry Swing

Dir. Shynola

UK | 2009

Grizzly Bear - While You Wait For Others

Dir. Sean Pecknold

USA | 2009

Grizzly Bear - While You Wait for the Others from Grandchildren on Vimeo.

We Were Once A Fairytale - I can't find it online but it's on iTunes, sorrrrr :(

Dir. Spike Jonze

USA | 2009

Logorama - jahh can't find dis one either but here's a real shitty screengrab of a real good thing!

Dir. H5

USA | 2009

LA: Wednesday AM stuff and heritage rejection

This morning I got myself a drink at Starbucks. I don't drink coffee cus it: 1. makes me crraaayyyzzzaayyy, 2. usually makes me shit like heck no, 3. makes my pee smell like coffee (anyone else????) but I don't know, it just seemed appropriate. Also, I had to use the restroom reeeeal bad and I was in there for like ever. Anyway, I felt bad so I decided to make a purchase. Pumpkin Spice is back, said the sign. And then my brain went all oooooh and ahhhhh over this. I got the Pumpkin Spice iced latte and it was pretty tasty but I just don't know.....something about an autumn specialty that's meant to conjure cosiness and changing foliage in blazing LA heat felt weird. To get over this, I walked like 2 miles to the nearest nail salon for a mani-pedi (sweet term, innit?) Just kidding. It's gross.

Anyway, just like it is in NYC, the nail places here are run by Korean people. As are the dry cleaners, delis, Korea town, et cetera. My people! But I am dejected by them. And it happens like this: I go into an obviously-Korean-owned establishment and they speak to me in broken English so I try to facilitate the communication by speaking to them in Korean. But first, the woman at the dry cleaners, after fully imbibing my Korean response, rejected my "we are the same people"/"with arms wide open" attempt and looked me squarely in the eyes and continued speaking to me in Engrish. Offensive! And then the same thing happened again, at the nail salon. After telling the woman in Korean I'm sorry for having yucky feet, she was all like "whatever", or whatever. I don't get it. Sucks a big cawkward.

But at least my nails are pretty now! Mommy bunny would be so proud. She always said I could be the grossest gutterpunk turd but as long as my hands and feet are groomed, I can still be considered a lady. My nails are kind of sea foamy but the color's officially called "Hey! Get in Lime!". Cosmetic copywriters are such nerd alerts. WARNING: chode fingers belowwww!!

strangers on deh train

Hey everyone! I'm on vacay!! In Los An-jealous(??) (no, don't be). I got into town via Amtrak with my friend cross country, the first train from NYC to Chicago, the other from Chicago to LA. The last leg of the trip meant two nights in a double decker train without any electrical outlets by our seats so I spent a good portion of my sleepless evenings in the lower level bathrooms where I found places to plug in my laptop and cellphone. Ace! I attempted to chronicle the adventure. Here is something I Word Doc'd in the restroom. Jealous???? No, don't be. It had to be done.

There are lots of weirdos on the train. There was Tim (or Timp, as he is apparently called by his friends) the crackhead, who was sitting in the seat in front of me. “I just did like 20 rails in the bathroom,” he broadcasted to his friend on the cellphone. “Man, the train is the way to move shit, I’m telling ya. There are no fuckin sniffin dogs, no one checkin bags, nothin’.” Then shortly after, he tried going to sleep by curling up into a ball and closing his eyes. I don’t know what he was trying to pull, thinking he could nap while blasted on massive amounts of cocaine. He didn’t get much rest from Chicago to Flagstaff, where he eventually got off. Most of his two nights on the train was spent talking loudly on the phone to his “baby”; “What! Baby! I thought you were talking about your vagina! [Pause] I said, I thought you were talking about your vagina!” Tim’s only carry-on was a backpack, a two-liter bottle of Sprite and a giant bag of rod pretzels. He wore only one T-shirt (and apparently, only carried one T-shirt his entire trip) and it said “iPray” in a similar logo lockup as the “Google” logo. And underneath the “iPray”, said smaller and in white type, “Do you?”

GOOD HEAD

In about T minus 40 minutes, I'll be getting a much-needed hair cut (or trim, it's still TBD). I'm very much looking forward to the part where a stranger washes my hair. It feels sooooo good! Sosososo good. My eyes roll back, my tongue sticks out, and my leg begins to kick involuntarily from pleasure overload. Can't wait!!!! It's probably going to be the highlight of my week fsho.

But I am not looking forward to the part where my hairdresser starts talkin to me like she know me or sumthin. Just do your job, woman! and let me be. I'm not paying you $50 so you can be distracted. I know that my exciting life of passing time, internet radio and youtube videos really gets you in a tizzy but please! calm yourself and make sure you don't get too close to my bangs. I'm trying to grow them out.

Happy 09.09.09!! And happy bday Spett and Zach.

I'm Feeling Lucky

The Banana Derby is usually a staple attraction at The Great New York State Fair but was omitted this year. Too bad! It was our first time visiting the town of Syracuse.

The Banana Derby is where little monkeys are put in costumes and they ride on dogs like horses and they race!!

Other hedonistic realities discovered however-- 24" corn dogs, wine slushies, carnival rides!, tons of farm animals (ie pink chickens, big ass bunnies), life size butter sculptures, freakshow attractions (smallest woman alive, old man baby, etc.), deep fried nachos, deep friend mashed potatoes, deep fried anything, obese goths, kid mullets & rat tails, Kate Gosselin lesbian hair.

Also, Happy September!

everything's fine

Sometimes I think that I actually died a long time ago

Once, when I was 17

And if not then

Another time, when I was 21

So that right now, at this very moment, 

I'm in my afterlife just living

Chilling, as though nothing happened

Everything is fine

All the people I've met and 

All the things I'm doing today

Happen to play a part in my afterlife

And I'm fulfilling what I think is right

Because this is how I imagined I wanted my life to be lived

free form freak out & pimples!!

u guys I don't think my acne medication is working, aka my baby stopping pills, like bumps all over my forehead and shiz In a second i gotta go pop them in da B room. I'd rather do that than shave off my pimples like my mom once taught me to do-- she's a beauty queen her skin's real smoov Holy shyyyyte. Hope der is no bump in my belly any time soon, u know what i'm sayin?cus all I know is that my skin is breakin da fook out!! JK there will be NO babies, it's cool i'm preeeeettty sure of it. i mean, What good is all this $$$ for health insurance for when all i can afford to eat at night is crackers and beer (omg JK I like thai ice tea sans condenzd milk). I just wanna be in bed to finish watchin DREAMgirls, wowowow great movie but all I can do is sit here for a few more hours, creepy raymond carver img staring at me, he's got like mad rape in his eyes like no joke. it's a bad book cover but at least all them words are tyte SO SO tyte

Off switch

Say you're in a creative setting, be it in art, music, literature or publishing. Do you ever feel so bored or uninspired that you feel like your brain is throbbing in pain? 

I wonder if this means that 1.) your brain is actually exhausted from stimulation overload and it's crashing, or 2.) like food poisoning, you feel like your brain is starving but rejects everything but because it thinks everything is just plain dumb.  

Also, can creativity and madness be mutually exclusive?

CREEPER BEEPER

WHO DA FUQ IS DIS BROAD & WHY IS SHE IN MY NIGHTMARES??!?!?!! 

GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT

baller status

You In Reverse (B)

I am undoubtedly very excited about Built to Spill's forthcoming seventh album "There Is No Enemy". The way I feel connected to that band is something rooted and instinctual, really. Doug Martsch's voice brings me the same kind of comfort of that of my mother's. They could be my musical soul mate. In my rendition of "The Little Mermaid", I am Eric and I'm perennially haunted by the beautiful echos of northwestern indie guitar chords, and BTS is the Ariel that is trapped in that shell of sacred harmonies. I mean, there are other bands and musicians too, but BTS is up there.

For my father, the man who has introduced me to Simon & Garfunkel, The Carpenters, Frank Sinatra, and other greats or whatever, there's always been one band that superseded the rest. ABBA. It is always on. He can't ever get enough. Last holiday, on a family road trip to Toronto, we listened to ABBA on repeat for 10 hours straight there and another 10 hours back (driver's rules). And though my father's somber personality does not seem compatible to that of the disco gayness of ABBA, the magical bean of Swedish pop nestles deep in his gut and all is okay in his world. It's a love that my father really can't put into words, similar to how he can't put the correct lyrics to those songs. But it don't matter. I joked that I will be playing ABBA at his memorial service one day. He vehemently accepted the offer.